Dedication To My Father

This seat of circumstance I seat on, I’m gon speak on,

this hand of chance that held me back,

Gave my heart slew shots since I been old enuff to give buck shots!

Though it be choice, it aint my choice, wasn’t my noise that wasn’t that nice,

Heard that loud shout, shoot through ears that were silent…

I can’t understand this man! Why my old man got beef with his young ‘un?

Seed of his seed, blood of his blood, but blud…I’d be glad

If you could guide me through this guise, arise this side as I

Move forward, toward unbecoming the coward that cried every some nights

When that tiresome hand could sometimes hand me nothing but handsome hand slaps

When thunder would mockingly clap some nights! yea, they say freaks come out at nights

Even them beasts come out, be they cumming or cunning,

Them closet doors at night flung open, my head banged open, yea my arm be broken

Find myself flingin through an open door, doors banged shut, closed in my face,

through a wall goes my face, but even Tom wins them fights sometimes, Jerry gets

G’ ed up and fucked up sometimes...you only as weak as you think you are…so,

I stood and took my hood out on this hoodlum, this Houdini

that could make my life disappear through thin air, come like a western cowboy,

Last man standing…only

On of us left hanging,

The other be flying, landing on character branding, you they calling a coward…but,

Yo, that’s my daddy you lot be barking about, crackling about

Laughing and sharking about…

Keep hanging round those non-ending roundabouts running round and round

The demons that keep tempting and taunting him to take one for the road,

But they didn’t say it’s a non-ending road!

That bottle neck had my fathers head in a head lock,

Congenial this genie was to his gross conduct…yeah,

Misconduct stroke misdemeanour…life is meaner and yea, sometimes more than others…

Daddy didn’t have a Mercedes, kept turning 380-degrees,

One for the road too many times, never holding it down.

Voices keep shouting, noises keep rising, asleep but keep rousing.

Arise at hours not social-maybe I should be more social, more accommodating…more understanding…

Maybe...